AS SETE BRANCAS DE NEVE, THE SEVEN SNOW WHITES

This young adult book is a parody of the famous tale “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.” Seven parodies in fact; “The Seven Snow Whites and the Forty-Nine Dwarfs.” Each version has a deviation from the original story that, to make sense, propagates in a chain through the rest of the plot, like a big, white snowball; “The Seven White Snowballs”, “The Seven Snow White Balls”, “The Seven Snow Whites.”

Available in 3 options: 1) Bilingual printed book: Portuguese on the even pages and English on the odd pages; 2) eBook in Portuguese; and 3) eBook in English. 

Conception

After watching the Walt Disney movie several times a day for several months (perhaps years), at the request of her children, Cristie proposed the What-If exercise to imagine what would have happen if Snow White were less submissive, if she had not bitten the apple, if the witch in the background were a good person, if the mirror lied... And thus the book was being shaped, from the distortion of the original story by brothers Grimm. The plot began dark, like a road covered by mist. After a walk, the fog dissipated and the path could be seen. The plot revealed the path to follow in the adventure during the narration, as if having a life of its own, and it demanded the necessary elements for the production of certain senses.

Illustrations

The book is composed of seven stories with seven variations of the same protagonists. The drawings were filled with collage, nankin lines, or colored with crayons, watercolors or ecoline. The illustrations selected below were painted with watercolor on light parts and ecoline on dark parts, and outlined with nankin.

Excerpt

   [...]

   O planeta Terra estava maravilhoso após os seis dias da criação. Deus concebera criaturas tão originais que não deixava dúvida quanto à Sua existência. Só mesmo um Ser Supremo seria capaz de realizar tal obra. Quando chegou a vez do Homem, Deus já estava cansado de inventar. Decidiu copiar. Chamou Seus assistentes e delegou:

   — Façamos o Homem à nossa imagem e semelhança.  E foi descansar no sétimo dia.

   Os assistentes não podiam criar o Homem do ar, do pó, do barro, nem de coisa alguma, pois, apesar de santos, não eram deuses. Eles tinham que escolher um ser vivo já formado para dele derivar o Homo sapiens. Escolheram o macaco (ou um ancestral comum do Homem e do macaco). Era o animal mais fácil de transformar. A cada geração, alteravam os genes e os primatas nasciam com características mais humanas.

   Quando era quase macaco, o Homem grunhia, arrastava as mãos no chão e tinha pelos por todo o corpo e no rosto. Gradualmente foi se transformando até que um dia estabilizou. Demorou um pouco, mas afinal, o que são milhares de anos para quem tem a eternidade? Finalmente os assistentes também podiam descansar.

   Chamaram Deus e mostraram o que haviam feito. Deus batizou o primeiro homem estabilizado de Adão e a mulher de Eva. Deus que tudo sabe e que escreve certo por linhas tortas avisou-os sobre a maçã, o fruto proibido. Pegou-os na Sua mão gigante, abençoou-os e assoprou, espalhando os dois pela face da Terra como grãos de areia.

   — Cresçam e multipliquem-se.

   E assim começa a história de Adão e Eva, príncipe e princesa do planeta, destinados ao domínio sobre os peixes do mar, as aves do céu e os animais da terra.

   Eva cedo foi apelidada de Branquela de Neve. Não que fosse tão branca, mas o rosto e o corpo sem pelos é que a tornava diferente das outras fêmeas. Sem a proteção dos pelos, a mulher sentia frio e preferia viver nas cavernas, em vez de morar em árvores, como o resto do grupo. Os chimpanzés não podiam entender o favoritismo de Deus pela espécie humana, que parecia frágil demais.

   Infelizmente a mãe de Branquela de Neve morrera no parto, comum naquela época, pois os recursos médicos eram escassos. Seu pai morrera numa guerra, também comum na época, pois os povos do mundo eram ainda muito primitivos. Só havia lhe restado a madrasta.  

   Quando a menina cresceu, a rainha teve ciúme da sua beleza e destino. Não pôde obrigar Branquela a se vestir de trapos, porque na época todos andavam nus. Não pôde forçar Branquela a trabalhar feito criada, porque Deus ainda não havia inventado o trabalho. Então, a única maldade que pensou em fazer foi provar a Deus que a raça humana não deveria ser a escolhida.

   [...]

   [...]

  The planet Earth was wonderful after the six days of creation. God conceived so many original creatures that left no doubt about His existence. Only a Supreme Intelligence could have such competence. When the time came for humans, God was tired of inventing and decided to copy. He called His assistants and delegated:

   “Make man in our image after our likeness.” And He went to rest on the seventh day.

   The assistants could not create man from air, dust, mud, whatever, because, despite being saints, they were not gods. They had to choose a living being already formed from which to derive Homo sapiens. They chose the monkey (or a common ape-like ancestor). It was the easiest animal to transform. Every new generation the genes were modified and the primates gained more human characteristics.

   When he was still almost an ape, man grunted, walked dragging his hands on the ground and had hair completely covering his body and face. Gradually he evolved until one day he stabilized. It took a while, but what are thousands of years for those who have an eternity? Finally the assistants could rest too.

   They called up God and showed what they had done. God named the first whole man Adam, and the first whole woman Eve. God, who knows all and who writes straight with crooked lines, warned them about the apple, the forbidden fruit. He held the humans in his giant hand, blessed them and blew, spreading the two across the face of the Earth, like grains of sand.

   “Be fruitful and multiply.”

   And so the story of Adam and Eve begins, prince and princess of the planet, destined to the dominion over all the fish in the sea, birds in the air, and animals on earth.

   Eve was soon nicknamed Snow Whitey. Not because her skin was so white, but the hairless face and body made her different from the other females. Without the protection of fur, the human felt cold and preferred to live isolated in a cave, rather than in trees, like did the troops of monkeys. The chimps could not understand God’s favoritism for mankind, which seemed too fragile.

   Unfortunately Snow Whitey’s mother died in childbirth, common at that time, because medical resources were scarce. Her father died in a war, also common at that time, because the world’s peoples were still very primitive. Her stepmother was the only family she had left.

   When the girl grew up, the queen was jealous of her appearance and destiny. She could not force Whitey to dress in rags, because at that time all went naked. She could not force Whitey to work like a maid, because God had not invented work yet. So the only evil she thought of doing was to prove to God that mankind should not be the chosen race.

   [...]

Endorsement

“Creative and engaging ... makes you want more. Opens a range of possibilities, not only for fantasy, but also for reality itself. Anything can happen. The world becomes a possible place. Nothing is what it seems, there are no villains, only choices.” – Júlio Barbosa, poet and composer – PhD in Communications by  University of São Paulo.

“Cristie takes a classic tale and makes it new, adding fresh ideas and clever references that keep the reader engaged and active. The Seven Snow Whites inspires thought, imagination, wonder and laughter in both Portuguese and English.” – William Robert Schumacher Junior, English Teacher - Bachelor of Arts and Sciences, University of Arizona.

“An extremely funny and engaging collection of seven ‘what if’ stories. What if Snow White had been ugly? What if the prince had not married Snow White? These beautifully crafted stories entertain on more than one level; all of them fabulous!” – Simon Tharby, English Translator and Teacher - Master of Science in Psychology, University of East London, and CELTA diploma, University of Cambridge.